If you don’t like this, I’ve got a tube of airplane glue…

 

VaporTini at Red Kiva

VaporTini at Red Kiva

Well, I was going to tell you all about Pierogifest in Whiting, Ind., this weekend, but instead I’ve got some hot, if insubstantial news:

The VaporTini.

You you don’t drink this new potion, you inhale its fumes.

Offered every Thursday beginning Aug. 6 at Red Kiva in the West Loop:

The VaporTini consists of flavor-enhanced alcohol vapors served in a glass globe that you inhale by “sipping” through a straw.

The glass globe with custom-made silver metal base has a ’70s mod, futuristic feel which appropriately fits the VaporTini — the future of cocktailing.

Red Kiva’s mixologists create the vapors by heating the booze-filled glass globes to 110 degrees. Users inhale the steam through a glass straw for about 20 minutes.

Red Kiva proprietor Julie Palmer was inspired to create her “inhale-tail” while in Helsinki, Finland, where they dash vodka onto hot coals in the sauna. Her dad, an engineer, helped to create the vaporware.

The $10 steam suck comes with garnishes, so it’s not entirely airborne. Flavors include:

Effen Black Cherry Vanilla vodka with chocolate-covered cherry garnish

Tanqueray Rangpur with candied citrus peel garnish

Knob Creek with griottine garnish

Absolut Raspberri with raspberry candy and chocolates

 
Where’s Lenny Bruce, now that we need him?